Louisa Claire

21 Things I Know Today

1. I am not superwoman.

2. It’s not fair to get your period back so soon after having a baby. There’s enough to exhaust and overwhelm you without monthly hormones to “help”.

3. The Focus Booster is a great tool. Thanks Nicole.

4. I do have to work.

5. I don’t have to do everything I am doing.

6. I am made to work; I can’t help but do many of the things I am doing.

7. I am doing to much and  I am struggling. This could also have something to do with #2.

8. Small Notebook is wise and her words are with me a lot at the moment. Just because I could do something, doesn’t mean I should. Can someone make me a poster for my wall? I need that reminder every day.

9. My daughter is a soft, kind soul. “I’ll make you happy Mummy” she said and proceeded to fart. Then she danced for me…” She was right. She did make me happy.

10. Blogging is relational and centered on community.

11. It only takes one person to change the tone of a community.

12. Sometimes I wish I didn’t believe so strongly in being home with my kids when they are young because it’s hard and I want to do things. I never thought I would struggle so much with wanting it all.

13. When my kids overwhelm me I want to walk away. Not for long, but just to breathe again.

14. Just because it’s your birthday doesn’t mean life stops – kids don’t sleep, people get sick. This doesn’t  bother me the way it would have at 20.

15. I want a dishwasher and a cleaner.

16. My mother taught me to say I’d “like” something rather than “want” it for a reason. It was a good reason.

17. I’d like a dishwasher and a cleaner.

18. There are boundaries with everything. Not everything needs to be spoken.

19. I want to give my girl a hug. See  #9.

20. I feel better – calmer, more centered, having written this post but…

21. Some things in my life need to change.


Thoughts on “21 Things I Know Today

  1. I don’t know how you do anything else other than look after your children when you have 2 little ones.
    I struggle some days with one toddler & I have a dishwasher & I just decided last week (after a little meltdown) to have a cleaner come fortnightly.

    I definitely hear you with number 12.

    Maybe there is just one thing that you could drop off your list or delegate – I’m sure there are people in your community that would be happy to help.
    Keep up the good work (& I find a walk on the beach helps clear the air) :)
    Helena recently posted..Motherhood – A Fine Balancing ActMy Profile

  2. Great that making your list helped you feel better. I can relate to many of those points too. Sometimes just seeing it all down on paper (or virtual paper) helps clarify where you are at and enable you to find a path forward. x

  3. Louisa you are an awesome and amazing woman. I can tell that and I haven’t even met you IRL (yet). I love this post – so real and reflective of all mummies lives. In the short time I’ve known you online I’ve already seen you do some fabulous things. You are a doer. Someone who makes things happen. I always try to remember to just focus on the important stuff – the rest will just fall into place! Love your work girl!
    Caz (The Truth About Mummy) recently posted..Never fail carrot cakeMy Profile

  4. Number 12 hits home for me. I understand how privilged I am to have the chance to be at home with my kids. I know it has been the right thing to do. Even with teen it is SO important be here when they come home. But it is HARD. Harder than anything else I have ever done in my entire life. And mine are 6, 11.5 and 13.
    And yet, Lou, the time has flown SO fast. The endless battles – the cleaning, the battles, the kid rearing and wrangling – are still here, but every now and again I get surprised by a little thing that makes me notice just how much we have all grown up.
    It has taken me years to learn Lou, but stay in the moment. Be present as all this roils around you. You are building lives and memories for you all. Too soon this part will be over and you will be able to fit in lots of other things. You are doing a fabulous job.
    And I love this blog too!

  5. Be nice to yourself. You’re doing an amazing job. Do what must be done, once that’s ticking along, add one more thing. Before you know it, your life will feel full but not overwhelming.
    It’s hard sitting by raising a baby and feeling like the world is moving along without you. But this time passes. Just enjoy, you know it gets easier. You have two blogs!! I find one is doing my head in. You can have it all, just not all at the same time. x
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  6. Great post Louisa. It is hard isn’t it? Raw, unforgiving, at times thankless hard work. You’re definitely not alone in your thoughts and although they are YOUR thoughts, in so many ways they are universal.
    P.S. I need a cleaner AND a personal chef… really!

  7. Hey lady! Thanks for stopping by my lil ole blog. I am glad it made me find this gem of a blog. I laughed so hard at this list. # 9 is fabulousity at its finest. Kids are grand, no?! # 11 is so very true. And me too re: # 13…that’s a good thing! #14 – WORD! Keep it movin’ people, just another day!!! Ha…# 15 and # 17 so funny. And # 16…ain’t that the truth?!? #20 – great! And # 21…I know the feeling. Somethings gotta give….

  8. Such an honest post – I hope you’re feeling better today.

    I have these days too. Usually more so when it’s cloudy or rainy. A bad night’s sleep doesn’t help either.

    I will donate you money for a dishwasher! It will change your life! I swear getting a dishwasher when J-Man was born saved our marriage!! And my sanity.
    My Mummy Daze recently posted..Family Snapshot- Lots of splashingMy Profile

  9. Feeling for you Louisa and wishing that I had taken the time to give you a great big hug on the weekend. I’m so sorry we didn’t get more of a chance to chat.

    I understand how hard what you are doing is (I have three children who were at home with me full time until they started school). Even now that they are all at school it can feel like life is passing me by while I do yet another load of washing, discover another sock or 7 (no matching pairs) down the side of my son’s bed or say no to a social outing because a family with one income can’t afford to fund me ‘lunching with the girls’.

    You are doing something important. Go easy on yourself, allow your children to make you smile, forgive yourself for not being able to do everything (none of us can), and know that even though you feel isolated, there are many of us out there who really do understand how hard it can be and we’re wishing you well. xxx
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  10. Gorgeous post – I can NOT believe how wise your daughter is, knowing how funny farts are at such a young age!

    Keep writing, Louisa. You have a wonderful voice xo

  11. oh honey! hugs

    I think those early years are the hardest from so many perspectives. I can only echo what others have said – be kind to yourself and it will (eventually) get easier.

    I think being a stay at home parent has become a very undervalued position in todays society. Please know that what you are doing is important, does have value, is a legitimate choice and well worth it in the end.

    As for wanting it all? There’s nothing wrong with that. You may find though that you can’t have it all in this moment in time without putting yourself under too much pressure. Just remember that you don’t have to do it all “right now” and some things may well be sweeter for the wait if you can’t manage them all at once.

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  12. All of them strike home – but #’s 12 & 13 especially. I have 5 kids, the oldest two are a year and two weeks apart. Now they’re 21 & 20 (“grown up” they tell me, “not so!” say I ) When they’re little it’s hard – but they’re sweet and so open. (Unlike the teenage years, sigh….)
    Know what you’re doing is *most* important – and you’re not alone. Love this post!
    Lisa Taylor recently posted..Curtain ClimbersMy Profile

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